Friday, January 9, 2015

New Year, Another Attempt

Last year I tried to do the Orange Rhino Challenge (no yelling) and failed...miserably. I was able to become much more AP/peaceful over the course of the year, but just couldn't get control of my yelling. This year I've decided to try again!
I managed to make it all the way through the first week without any yelling, and then just failed. Hubs got the kids Mt. Dew slushies and it had a major negative impact on G's behavior and I lost it. I managed to catch myself each time, apologize, and walk away but I still yelled.
I sat down with G this morning and let him know that I was sorry, that it wasn't his fault, and that I'll keep trying to stop yelling but it's much harder than I thought it would be. I grew up in a very yell centered environment, my whole family yelled (still does) all the time, for every.little.thing. It may take me awhile, but I'm determined! He said that it was ok, he knows I'm trying, he understands that his behavior wasn't the best and he apologized and said he'll be trying harder too.
I really, really feel like this ability for us both to admit we were wrong, admit to out faults, apologize, has come from the more peaceful way of parenting that I've been working on for the past year.
I will continue to try. I will be the person I hope to be, the person I see in my head and usually feel in my heart. I won't give up. I won't allow myself to wallow in my failures. I can do this!